On December 30th, @dairydino posted the first of several tweets that made us laugh, raise our eyebrows, and utter the word "eewwww" more than once. His tweets were so well received and much retweeted that we decided to award him a Grammy-like sweep for the entire month of January. Yes, you could call him the Beyoncé of dairy farmers.
And the winning tweets are (in his own words): "you might be a dairyman if..."
- you dont remember the last time you showered before work
- you get home at night and find syringes in your pocket
- you laugh when your friends complain about having to work on a Saturday or New Years Day!!
- (please see link)
- you have experienced a wet tail to the face before breakfast
- you have experienced a wet tail to the face before breakfast (Common occurrence? It was posted twice.)
- you have seen a dog eat a week-old placenta
- you have drank milk straight out of the bulk tank
- you know that all calves have no will to live
- every pair of pants you own has a teat dip stain on them
- you agree that the five-gallon bucket is one of the greatest devices ever invented
- all beef cows look fat to you
- you have ever said "good enough for a barn" while working on your house
- you have ever combined pajamas and rubber boots to do midnight calf checks
- you own a pair of insulated coveralls/bibs and they are usually crusty
- you've ever broken an Olympic track and field record running away from a bull
- you have dehorned calves and carried the smell with you for the rest of the day
- when a city friend grimaces about the smell of a dairy on the road you have said "smells like money"
- you have ever witnessed a cow nearly killing herself trying to jump over, under, out of or into something
- you have had to use some type of power tool to extract said cow from said situation
- you cant eat cottage cheese cuz it reminds you too much of mastitis
- you have ever been shoulder deep in a cow (either hole)
- you have ever had a bolus/magnet spit on you
- you know the value of a mid-afternoon nap
- you have ever taken said nap in a barn
- you wake up at chore time even when on vacation
- you have ever used milkhouse chemicals to clean your bathroom
- you can accurately weight a cow with your eyes and be within 50 pounds
- you can back a (manure)
spreader up with your eyes closed - you have ever pulled a (manure)
spreader with your pickup, through town - the smell of corn silage is one of the best smells in the world to you
- your biggest fear in the world is milking a treated cow into the tank
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